So your partner has proposed, and now you’re going to pick out a ring together. Where to start?
My husband and I were in the same boat recently. It took a lot of time and research to figure out what we wanted, and we learnt a lot in the process. We actively looked at diamonds and designs for about 3 months before finally making the big decision. I hope I can pass on some of what we learned in this tutorial, so that you can learn the basics quickly and move onto the fun part faster.
STEP 1: DIAMOND THEORY
The foundation of diamond theory always begins with the 4 C’s: cut, clarity, colour and carat weight. These 4 C’s are scaled from excellent to poor. Combined, they give you a succinct overview of a stone’s characteristics, its rarity, and relative price point.
The cut of a diamond pertains to how well it was cut, and therefore how much it sparkles. It is generally ranked from excellent to poor.
A diamond’s clarity will reflect how ‘clear’ it is – or how many inclusions/blemishes are inside the stone. They range from ‘flawless’ (or FL) to ‘included’ (I3). The fewer the inclusions, the higher its value.
Diamonds also range in colour, with colourless diamonds being most sought-after. Colour ranges from ‘colourless’ (D) to ‘light’ (Z).
Finally, a diamond’s carat weight reflects its size. Commonly, people seek diamonds ranging from 0.25 carats to 2 carats, but some stones can be much larger. Obviously, the larger the diamond, the higher the price tag.
This table shows the complete rankings of the 4 C’s according to the GIA:
| Cut | Clarity | Colour | Carat Weight |
| Excellent | Flawless (F) | D | 2.00ct + |
| Very Good | Internally Flawless (IF) | E | |
| Good | Very Very Slightly Included (VVS1) Very Very Slightly Included (VVS2) | F | |
| Fair | Very Slightly Included (VS1) Very Slightly Included (VS2) | G | |
| Poor | Slightly Included (SI1) Slightly Included (SI2) | H | |
| Included (I1) Included (I2) Included (I3) | etc | 0.25ct |
Another feature that diamond purchasers consider is fluorescence. This is the extent to which diamonds emit light when they are exposed to UV rays. Majority of diamonds do not emit visible light and will be categorized as having ‘none’. The minority of stones that are fluorescent will be categorized as having ‘medium’, ‘strong’, or ‘very strong’ fluorescence. Buyers typically look for stones with no fluorescence. However, I have spoken to several jewelers who believe that a slightly florescent stone will appear lighter in color, more visually pleasing and end up being slightly cheaper. It’s an option worth looking into.
Diamond certification
I recommend only considering diamonds that have been independently graded and come with a certificate. Make sure you ask to see this certificate before purchasing a ring or stone. Doing so will ensure you have proof of your diamond’s 4 C’s, and ensures you get what you pay for. The most common bodies to grade and certify diamonds are the Gemological Institute of America (GIA) and the American Gemological Society (AGS). There are other bodies out there, but be sure to research their independence and credibility before replying on them.
Beware of diamonds that are not independently certified. Majority of jewelers understand the importance of independent certification, but a minority will not, or cannot, supply that certification. Tiffany & Co are one example – they only provide an in-house certificate. Certain cuts of diamonds are also unable to be independently certified, such as Crown of Fire diamonds.
STEP 2: DETERMINE A BUDGET
It’s virtually impossible to get a perfect stone of large carat weight. Such stones are incredibly rare and astronomically expensive. Ultimately, most people choose to compromise on one or two of the 4 C’s, and focus on what they really want out of a diamond. You need to ask yourself what matters to you.
Do you want it to sparkle above all others, and be clear to the eye? If so, you’ll want to focus on clarity and cut dimensions, and compromise on colour and carat weight to fit your budget.
Do you want it to appear larger to the eye and demand attention? Then you’ll want a greater carat weight, and compromise on clarity, cut and colour to fit your budget.
If you would prefer for it to be pure in colour, then focus on that. However, it’s worth keeping in mind that diamond colour is also very hard to detect with the naked eye. The only way I really noticed a difference was with loose diamonds sitting on a pure white paper background. In everyday life, you’ll be less likely to notice a slight colour. Colour can also be corrected by slight fluorescence, which won’t cost you any extra. For these reasons, I think diamond colour isn’t really a feature many people will rely on when buying a diamond.
In my opinion, it’s best to focus on clarity and cut, as it will be a pretty, eye-catching diamond and appear larger by reflecting more light.
Deciding how much to spend on a ring is really personal and varies greatly. People can spend anywhere from a few hundred dollars to tens of thousands of dollars on a ring. Only look at rings you can afford. After all, who wants to enter marriage with a heap of debt?? Fiscal responsibility means more to a marriage than any ring.
STEP 3: DECIDE ON A STYLE
Diamond cuts
Diamonds are cut in a variety of shapes. Decide on a favourite will bring you one step closer to finding your perfect ring.
When I first began looking at diamonds with my partner, I really loved the looks of the oval brilliant cut, the emerald cut and the round brilliant. The oval brilliant cut brings a vintage touch to a design, and has been quite popular recently (think Blake Lively and Kate Middleton).
There are also some really beautiful baguette cut designs out at the moment (I fell in love with this one by Harry Winston) – the cut seems to show off the clarity and colour of the center diamond while staying sophisticated and not over-the-top.
In the end, though, we could not go past the classic round brilliant, which is designed to have the maximum facets possible and therefore maximum brilliance (check out the science here). I also felt that it would be a style I would love forever and would never go out of fashion. Here’s hoping!
Diamond settings
Photo by Chayuth
To get a better idea of the style of your band, consider the way in which you want the diamond to be attached to the ring. Common settings include the solitaire setting, which fastens the diamond to the band with prongs.
Pros: This setting has been said to maximise the amount of light which can enter the diamond, as well as its perceived size and prominence.
Cons:some people may worry about the stone coming loose from the prongs. This rarely happens (particularly with platinum prongs) and can be avoided by taking your ring to be checked regularly by your vendor and replacing prongs if they are no longer sturdy.
Photo by Bryan Schneider
Another popular setting is the halo setting. This involves surrounding the center diamond with one or more ‘halos’ of smaller diamonds.
Pros: Halo settings are praised for making the center stone appear larger than it is at a fraction of the price. They also allow for more than one type of stone into a ring, and protect the center diamond from being knocked and damaged.
Cons: after some time, some of the smaller stones may come loose and go missing. Most of the time, the consumer will be responsible for replacing them. Be sure to discuss this with your vendor, should you choose a halo setting.
Photo by Rebecca Schley
Three stone settings are also quite common. I find them beautifully symbolic, because they can signify the joining of two people under God (or on Earth, or children). That aside, they cover the whole finger with diamonds and really steal the show (and who doesn’t want that)!
Photo by streetphotos
Another popular setting is the tension setting. This involves the center diamond being held between two sides of the band with pressure.
Pros: using a tension setting really confirms the diamond’s strength and rarity, as only high-quality stones can withstand the pressure required. Some also argue that tension settings are safer than prong settings, but this is widely debated.
Cons: tension-set bands cannot be resized as doing so will disturb the pressure placed on the stone. Purchasers either need to custom order their band or buy it off the shelf.
Band designs
There are countless band designs out there. From etching to diamond-set to minimalist, a band will show off your personal style and allow you to frame your diamond however you like.
Common non-stone bands include flat bands and knife-edge bands. Flat bands are very classic and traditional. A tapered or split-shank flat band is also really flattering and focuses all the attention on the center stone. Knife-edge bands are also very classic, made famous by the Tiffany Setting. This is arguably the most iconic band in diamond ring history, and is ubiquitous with class and style. I fell in love with this design because it directed all focus to the diamond, while creating a beautiful side-silhouette. It’s also not too busy and is perfectly paired with a diamond-set wedding band.
Pavé bands are also super popular right now. They surround the center diamond with smaller diamonds, upping the wow factor by 100. If you want the whole ring to sparkle, go for a pavé band! Diamonds are pavé-set by tiny metal prongs with no empty space in-between each gemstone. Channel-set bands are similar to pavé bands in that they both utilise small diamonds. The difference is in the way that they are attached: channel-set diamonds are set within a long line by metal edges on the side of the ring.
A note of caution: smaller diamonds in bands have a reputation for coming loose and falling out over time. If opting for a diamond-set band, be sure to ask your jeweler for a warranty (if possible), and be very careful while wearing your ring. Also note that diamond-set bands require more-frequent cleaning to maintain their beautiful sparkle.
Band material
These days, three materials are commonly used to create engagement and wedding bands – yellow gold, white gold and platinum. Here is a table of some characteristics of each.
| Yellow gold | White gold | Platinum |
| Cheaper | Cheaper | More expensive |
| Weaker metal (rigid particles) | Weaker metal (rigid particles) | Stronger metal (more resilient) |
| Harder metal (scratches easier, results in loss of metal) | Harder metal (scratches easier, results in loss of metal) | Softer metal (scratches create Patina finish; no metal loss) |
| Maintains yellow colour | Goes yellow over time (Rhodium plating deteriorates) | Maintains white colour |
| Stays shiny (noticeable scratches) | Stays shiny (noticeable scratches) | Develops a Patina finish (mattifies) |
As you can see, there is no superior option when it comes to choosing your metal. All come with pros and cons. White gold and platinum look very similar, but white gold bands often turn yellow and need to be re-plated, and platinum bands develop a patina finish over time, which needs to be polished if you don’t like the look.
STEP 4: GET SHOPPING!
Have a look at various physical stores before choosing your ring.
Some notable stores in Melbourne include the Australian Diamond Company (my favourite store!), Helen Badge Jewelry, Klepner’s, Angus & Coote, Keshett, Janai and Kalfin Jewelry.
Be sure to also check out online stores such as Blue Nile and James Allen. They tend to be very competitively priced. And even if you don’t want to buy a ring before seeing it in the flesh, having price comparisons can help you negotiate with your jeweler on the final price of a similar diamond. They also have a vast selection of styles, which can help you figure out exactly what you like. Unfortunately Blue Nile does not have a physical showroom in Australia yet, but I have visited one in the US and despite not purchasing a ring from them, their customer service was impeccable.